


Things Left Unsaid

by MissMorwen



Series: BuckyNat Prompts [17]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel 616
Genre: Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, F/M, Mild Smut, Mutual Pining, Past Relationship(s), Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-08
Updated: 2016-05-08
Packaged: 2018-06-07 03:31:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6783433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissMorwen/pseuds/MissMorwen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Natasha had a string of bruises around her throat. </p>
<p>***********</p>
<p>BuckyNat prompt: Civil War</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilers for Captain America: Civil War

Natasha had a string of bruises around her throat. Her fingers went to them without her being aware of it. She was usually conscious of every move she made, but her reflection showed her otherwise.

With what little self-control she had left, she remove the hand calmly, placing it in her lap, instead of snatching it away like she’d been burned. It was ridiculous. She’d never touched the scars like that, and she’d carried them with her for years.

But there was no point in kidding herself; she knew very well why it was different this time. She’d seen him afterwards in the airport, not the killing machine, but the man. He’d looked at her with caution, showing nothing of the uproar behind her own eyes. She didn’t look at him, forcing herself to focus on Steve; it was, after all, him she was helping.

 

 

Natasha had a string of bruises around her throat. And they were the reason why she wasn’t the one who asked Sharon to steal his backpack from the evidence room and have it send to Wakanda. Ready for when it was finally safe for him to come out of the ice again.

She could have gone to see him before he went under. T’Challa had been kind enough to let her know that he was helping Steve. That he had changed sides like she had. But she didn’t go. Not because she was afraid not to get recognized, but out of respect of Steve, whom she had already hurt by picking the other side. And because she had no way of explaining why she had kept that particular part of her past to herself.

At least that was what she told herself. What she needed to believe.

 

 

(Natasha had a string of bruises around her throat. They burned like embers under her skin and she pressed the fingers of her left hand to them to echo his touch. Her fingers were shorter and softer than his, but it didn’t matter, because she could feel him again. Feel him on her skin. She slipped her free hand down between her legs and came not long after, with no name on her lips, because she had no name for him now.)

 

 

Natasha had a string of bruises around her throat. They were fading, she could barely feel them anymore, and she wondered: Had his memories of her faded like them?


	2. Chapter 2

This much Bucky knew: He had tried to kill her more than once. Put a bullet in her stomach that should have killed her, that would have killed her if it had been anyone else. At the time he hadn’t been able to remember her, but going over it afterward showed him clearly that she had. Recalling the look in her eyes had almost sent him to his knees.

The second time he’d tried to kill her, she’d almost killed him, too. And when he went after her, the Winter Soldier’s rage almost blinding, she’d only smiled as he pursued her. He didn’t know if she’d only been adding fuel to the fire or if she’d genuinely happy that he was still alive. He didn’t want to know.

He could still feel her loose grip on his arm when she’d tried in vain to reason with the Winter Soldier. T’Challa’s intervention was another thing he was grateful for. When he saw her again at the airport, he wanted to yell at her for not giving her all when she fought him. For believing that the Soldier could be reasoned with.

But he’d held his tongue; because it was better she believed he didn’t remember her.

 

 

This much Bucky knew: He wasn’t safe with programming left in his brain. Not safe for Steve, not safe for the world, and especially not safe for her.

Going under wouldn’t be hard then, because it was his choice this time. And in the dreamless sleep, he wouldn’t be haunted by the memories of red hair and sharp kisses.

 

 

(This much Bucky knew: Her legs wrapped around him had been a good thing once. A thing that she’d enjoyed too. He’d buried his face between her legs and made her writher and moan. He’d buried himself in her and felt whole again.)

 

 

This much Bucky knew: He would never be able to make up for the hurt he cause her, the bullets he put in her. But he would try. When it was safe for him to wake up again he would try his hardest to make up for it. Maybe she would be able to forgive him then.


End file.
